Being charged with the role of Mommy brought more pain than just childbirth. After returning from the hospital with our new son, I sat and held him in awe of this little blessing. As I sat on the couch holding my baby boy, as any new mommy would; I looked into his little eyes as he gazed toward me and random thoughts like "Do you know what you mean to me? Do you know how much I need you? and Thank you for loving me." would rush my mind and filled my heart. For most women, these questions bring a feeling of comfort but for me they brought great pain. The pain of being abandoned, less than which is legally called adopted.
Before having my son, my view on being adopted were: You're loved more if you are picked rather than birthed." But after holding my son, it hit me. I was given up, tossed aside, no longer wanted by the very person I needed the most in life. This created a cloud of depression that spanned my first few years of motherhood. I knew I loved my adoptive mother who raised me but not understanding why I was "given away" after almost 2 years just seemed wrong. Of course I was told stories of why my mother couldn't keep me and those quick answers were supposed to appease my burning desire to know why. See, my adoptive mother couldn't handle any conversation about my birth mother or father or she would start asking me questioning like: " Don't we take care of you?" or my favorite "Where is this coming from?".
This would be the start of a push toward my God called purpose of leadership. God called me to raise this young man in a world of hate, criticism and struggle. After my heart pained and swelled, tears formed in my eyes and all I could say back was, "I will always be here for you. "
6.5 years later, I took my son to his first Tiger Cub meeting with the pack from his school. I watched him play, listen to campfire stories, roast marshmallows and eat cake with happiness and excitement all over his face. Then from across the fire pit, my son looked up in horror as the announcement was made that the tiger age den did not have a leader so he would not be able to be a cub scout. The look on my son's face told me right then that I would have to step up and be the leader of my son's group. This signaled the start of my 9+ year journey of mentoring, training and guiding not only the young boys in our Den but also adults in their future leadership positions. Needles to say my life was changed for the better.
Today, I am Strong!
I have gained mentors who have helped me develop into a person of service who helps develop talents within others. I have done this quietly for so long that I am now motivated to reach out and help even more people start to build the life that they truly enjoy. Don't wait any longer to step into your greatness.
I am currently building courses for my coaching programs but in the meantime grab your free copy of
The Mini-Mental Break to help you start to release your stress one breath at a time.
Start today because you're worth it!
-Cyndi Mallory
Before having my son, my view on being adopted were: You're loved more if you are picked rather than birthed." But after holding my son, it hit me. I was given up, tossed aside, no longer wanted by the very person I needed the most in life. This created a cloud of depression that spanned my first few years of motherhood. I knew I loved my adoptive mother who raised me but not understanding why I was "given away" after almost 2 years just seemed wrong. Of course I was told stories of why my mother couldn't keep me and those quick answers were supposed to appease my burning desire to know why. See, my adoptive mother couldn't handle any conversation about my birth mother or father or she would start asking me questioning like: " Don't we take care of you?" or my favorite "Where is this coming from?".
This would be the start of a push toward my God called purpose of leadership. God called me to raise this young man in a world of hate, criticism and struggle. After my heart pained and swelled, tears formed in my eyes and all I could say back was, "I will always be here for you. "
6.5 years later, I took my son to his first Tiger Cub meeting with the pack from his school. I watched him play, listen to campfire stories, roast marshmallows and eat cake with happiness and excitement all over his face. Then from across the fire pit, my son looked up in horror as the announcement was made that the tiger age den did not have a leader so he would not be able to be a cub scout. The look on my son's face told me right then that I would have to step up and be the leader of my son's group. This signaled the start of my 9+ year journey of mentoring, training and guiding not only the young boys in our Den but also adults in their future leadership positions. Needles to say my life was changed for the better.
Today, I am Strong!
I have gained mentors who have helped me develop into a person of service who helps develop talents within others. I have done this quietly for so long that I am now motivated to reach out and help even more people start to build the life that they truly enjoy. Don't wait any longer to step into your greatness.
I am currently building courses for my coaching programs but in the meantime grab your free copy of
The Mini-Mental Break to help you start to release your stress one breath at a time.
Start today because you're worth it!
-Cyndi Mallory
